Reclaiming my brain from Instagram to make big moves
If you follow me on the ‘gram, you may have seen my post about taking the rest of the year away from the app.
We already know that social media companies work hard to keep you and I addicted to the scroll, much like Big Tobacco sees dollar signs every time a kid picks up a smoking habit.
We’re also plenty familiar with the research on how these apps change human brains to be less attentive, more anxious, and basically not present to what’s happening IRL.
I’m not asking you to join me in this break. I do, however, want to share more on why I made this choice, because it applies to how we have to clear space to bring big goals to fruition.
Since starting Adderall for my ADHD last week, I’ve noticed that I haven’t needed the dopamine hits that I used to get from my phone. But the habit of picking up that stupid little rectangle every time I feel even slightly bored has been so ingrained that I’ve had to turn my phone completely off and put it in a drawer to keep it out of my hands.
I’ve often found myself opening Instagram to “just check one DM,” then regaining consciousness 15 minutes later with no idea why I was there in the first place. This is coming from someone who made it a point to delete the app most evenings, has all notifications turned off, and almost always has her phone in focus mode!
Meanwhile, I’m making big moves in my business that require me to take up space in ways I’ve been avoiding, like asking for referrals and pitching myself to podcasts.
I’m also uncovering deeper layers of unconscious money beliefs that have kept me from earning what I should. (“I’m gonna get cancelled/called out if I make too much!” Cue abandonment issues.)
Plus, I have a new podcast project that I’ve been dreaming up for a few months (stay tuned).
These things require a new level of SPACE and FOCUS from me that isn’t possible without confronting my phone addiction.
My addicted brain tried to talk me out of the break. The convo I had with myself went something like this:
Addicted brain: But what about my business? Don’t I need to share what I’m doing?
Wise brain: No, Lauren. You were getting maaaybe one new client every six months from Instagram. And also, you can schedule stuff without being in the app.
Addicted brain: But what if lose touch with people?
Wise brain: That’s what texts and email are for. You’re already terrible at responding to DMs, anyway.
Addicted brain: Shouldn’t I be there to share info about activism?
Wise brain: Going off in a post and resharing to stories might feel like you’re doing something, but they could also be a bandaid on the bottomless grief that comes with these times. You can show up more effectively in other ways, like supporting your clients and loved ones and getting more involved in local organizing.
Anyway, maybe this will prompt you to look differently at your habits and things you’re doing simply because someone made you think that you “have to” do them. I’d love to hear if it does!
Lauren Kay Roberts is an anticapitalist coach who helps community change agents get messy family stuff and toxic cultural conditioning out of the way of making their impact. Book a free Change Agent Support Call here, and learn more about her work at www.laurenkayroberts.com.
